June 6, 2019

Today is your 18th birthday, my Drake Danielle. How you have grown into a man and I could see that you and Rhoanne are so in love and I am glad you found each other. I have missed my baby but you are no longer that. You have found another love and I wish you both well. Although you are both still young, I could see that there’s no stopping your happiness. Just continue to inspire each other until you finish your studies. You have a long journey ahead of you and you will need to lift one another up all the time. I wish you a lot of good things, Drake Danielle. But most of all, I wish for our togetherness, for moments where I can also hold your hand and give you a warm hug. I love you so much and I will always be here, waiting for you. You know where I am, please come.

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Hi there again! 😀

Remember this, my Children! Your Mommy is just around, waiting patiently for you! ❤️

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My Lance’s Birthday is Today

I wish you had a happy day, Lance Michael. I wish you had laughter and smiles on your face with your brothers around you. It’s been years since we’ve been together on your birthday and I just want to tell you how much you are loved by your only Mommy. I hope to celebrate your birthday someday with you soon, my Lance Michael. I love you truly, that is all that I can say, again and again. Oh may this love pierce your heart at last and that you will finally find your way back to me.

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This is for you, my Lost Boys! Happy New 2019!

I wish to share with you Pope Francis’ New Year’s homily.

“You can have flaws, be anxious, and even be angry, but do not forget that your life is the greatest enterprise in the world. Only you can stop it from going bust. Many appreciate you, admire you and love you.

Remember that to be happy is not to have a sky without a storm, a road without accidents, work without fatigue, relationships without disappointments. To be happy is to find strength in forgiveness, hope in battles, security in the stage of fear, love in discord. It is not only to enjoy the smile, but also to reflect on the sadness. It is not only to celebrate the successes, but to learn lessons from the failures. It is not only to feel happy with the applause, but to be happy in anonymity. Being happy is not a fatality of destiny, but an achievement for those who can travel within themselves. To be happy is to stop feeling like a victim and become your destiny’s author. It is to cross deserts, yet to be able to find an oasis in the depths of our soul. It is to thank God for every morning, for the miracle of life. Being happy is not being afraid of your own feelings. It’s to be able to talk about you. It is having the courage to hear a “no”. It is confidence in the face of criticism, even when unjustified. It is to kiss your children, pamper your parents, to live poetic moments with friends, even when they hurt us. To be happy is to let live the creature that lives in each of us, free, joyful and simple. It is to have maturity to be able to say: “I made mistakes”. It is to have the courage to say “I am sorry”. It is to have the sensitivity to say, “I need you”. It is to have the ability to say “I love you”.

May your life become a garden of opportunities for happiness … That in spring may it be a lover of joy. In winter a lover of wisdom. And when you make a mistake, start all over again. For only then will you be in love with life. You will find that to be happy is not to have a perfect life. But use the tears to irrigate tolerance. Use your losses to train patience. Use your mistakes to sculptor serenity. Use pain to plaster pleasure. Use obstacles to open windows of intelligence.

Never give up …. Never give up on people who love you. Never give up on happiness, for life is an incredible show.”

❤️Pope Francis

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My Christmas Wish

Once again it’s Christmas. And I’ve missed being with you on this season once again. How I wish I can spend this wonderful time of the year with you, Kurt, Lance and Drake! No present in this world can replace the gift of just being with the three of you, once more, if only.

Blessed Christmas, my lost boys, wherever you are and whatever you do, remember that Mommy is always beside you! ❤️

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a painting for you

This was done by my artist friend, Rose Rubinos, as I requested her to paint something about the 3 of you and me. Here, we seem to be walking on the waters, oblivious to where we are heading just enjoying our time together. I miss those moments spent with you, my lost boys, 4 of us playing and laughing around. Do you also miss me? I feel it in my heart that you also tremendously do.

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Remember this song?

We used to sing this song, my lost boys. Remember the movie, Land Before Time? I used to watch it with you. I miss you Kurt, Lance and Drake. I woke up around 2am crying out for you. May my longing spirit fly to you and touch your coldest hearts, warm them up and ignite them with the fire of my love.
Somewhere Out There
Somewhere out there beneath the pale moonlight
Someone’s thinking of me and loving me tonight
Somewhere out there someone’s saying a prayer
That we’ll find one another in that dream somewhere out there
And even though I know how very far apart we are
It helps to think we might be wishin’ on the same bright star
And when the night wind starts to sing a lonesome lullaby
It helps to think we’re sleeping underneath the same big sky
Somewhere out there, if love can see us through
Then we’ll be together somewhere out there
Out where dreams come true
And even though I know how very far apart we are
It helps
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